I'm on a journey to find health and happiness through a more holistic and green lifestyle.

I find the world to be abrasive. =) That is to say, I feel the need to armor myself, physically and emotionally, in order to face life. Don't we all? Maybe. For whatever reason, it has become a priority in my life to rid my immediate environment of irritating things. And I'm sensitive! So there is much work to be done. But. I have thought for a long time that the things I come in contact with every day, and the stuff used to clean and maintain these things, need to be gentle and non-toxic. I have had eczema my entire life. For a long time I just dealt with it, and accepted that sometimes it's bad, and sometimes it's not, and that it will fluctuate a lot. Gradually over time I have come to find that certain things, fabrics, cleansers, materials, are more irritating to my skin than others. Stress can exacerbate it. In more recent times, I have realized that every aspect of my life improves when I improve conditions for my skin. Hah! What a concept! Thus my (long time) interest in going green, and my more recent desire to live a more holistic lifestyle. (I think I've felt a desire for a long time to live in a harmonious way with myself, my surroundings, and nature, but didn't have a name for it.) Anyhow, this blog is a journal of my trials and errors, and basic crooked path to find a balanced and peaceful existence for myself and my family. Thanks for your interest! I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Ask For What You Want and other life challenges

If my days are going to start in the middle of the night, I am going to have more than one brain-stream. Sometimes. So here is #2 for today.

If we want something, we should ask for it.

Why is it that the simplest concepts are the hardest to master? It's true. Eat well because it's good for you. Wow, do we, as a species, have trouble with that simple fact! There are many of those. But one I really, really struggle with is, if I want something, ASK for it! I rarely do! Why is this on my mind today? Because this morning my darling son woke up (and therefore I woke up) at 2 a.m. One thought was sort of an amazement that I didn't feel worse. Sometimes when woken up like that I have to go through a series of curses and self-pity before I accept my fate and face it with a (sort of) grin. I credit this to having gone to bed early the last two nights (9:30 p.m. and 10 pm respectively) The other thought was that it was going to be an incredibly long day for me. Darling son would likely wait until it was time to drive dear daughter to school before he napped. Or just before, after DD woke up. Either way I would not be able to nap with him. And if he napped then, he wouldn't nap again. Probably until it was time to pick DD up again. Argh! So I stewed in my own self-pity, and when hubby got up, I looked piteously at him, which got me what I hoped for, sympathy. =) And then the announcement that he was leaving for work in three minutes. I was back to feeling sorry for myself and looking ahead to a looooooooooooooong day. Hubby commented about the possibility of my getting a nap, and I said what I said above. Not likely. Then I said, looking as pathetic as possible, "unless you pick DD up from school...?" He thought briefly, and said, "I'll do it! I'll pick her up." YEAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Whoo-Hoo! My entire day changed in that second. Not only did I only have to drive while dangerously tired with my two little ones one time today, but I may actually get to nap! Wow! While my brain turned from sour to sweet, hubby discussed with DD what she would like to do after school. DD later told me that they are going ice skating and out for ice cream! Wow! That gives me hours to sleep or whatever, plus it will get me out of taking the kids swimming at the Y after school, something I've been promising for three days. And all it took was me asking for what I wanted. Which I never do. I need to work on that!


  1. Ask and you shall recieve...right? I LOVE getting a reprieve from the daily humdrum. Enjoy it!

  2. Apparently I prefer to be the martyr than to ask for help. I don't know why I do this, but I do! Simple thing- ask for help- so hard for me, too. Hubby and I realized this and tried to remember to use "I need" statements for awhile... it was like magic. I couldn't believe I didn't know how to do this! Thanks for the reminder, because I still don't ask enough either.

  3. Fortunately, you got the answer you needed. You would have felt horrible if hubby said, "No." I know that's what stops me from asking my hubby for what I need- I can't handle the disappointment of "No". It's better for my spirits to just deal with the tough day ahead rather than add anger towrds my loved one to my list of things to deal with during the day.

    I hope you got that nap in. And I'm glad your hubby recognized you needed that today.

    - JSN

  4. M: It's surprisingly difficult to ask for what we need or want. Why is that?

    J: You are so right. Being angry and bitter doesn't help one bit. I really only have hubby to rely on for help, so I put all of my eggs in one basket when I ask for his help. I feel that I have to be pretty desperate and pathetic to ask for his help, then flood him with gratitude. Then I get mad at myself for that!

    Simply knowing I didn't have to watch the clock yesterday allowed me to curl up with my son. I slept for four hours!!

    I realized that everyone in my household was able to put him/herself first except for me, and I am the only one who can/will make changes for me. It's a process, but I'm working on it!